Archive for the ‘Communication’ Category

Life is too short to waste it on grievances. So why not take a difficult moment and turn it into a learning experience, and a true gift to share with others?

Many of you know that I have experienced problems with my back over the years – ruptured discs, aches, pains and much of it was caused from overuse and working out too hard, too often. Every time I think I am “super good to go” and I start a new exercise program or buy a new bike another injury occurs. This cycle has been truly frustrating and painful.

I find insight to so many questions in the most obscure places sometimes! This time I was sitting in an audience of 300, listening to Deepak Chopra talk about looking at everything as a gift. I hadn’t put those words in articulating my back problems over the years, but I did take some time to think about the gifts I have actually received from back pain. Yes! Gifts! The first time I ruptured a disc was very serious, of course, and I lost the use of my right leg and needed immediate surgery. I had just moved from Minneapolis to Portland, Oregon and knew no one. I had a 7-year old daughter to take care of. I had no choice but to call my father, a person who I knew of but did not truly know. He graciously and surprisingly got on an airplane and came to help.

This became the beginning of a very healing and beautiful relationship with my father. He visited about every 3 to 6 months for 10 to 15 years. It was an amazing gift! Who would have thought rupturing a disc and having surgery would turn my life in a positive direction? So, I began to look at all the times I injured something from working out too much or just being too busy to really pay attention to what I was doing to my body. When I was injured, I had to slow down or sit down, stopping altogether. As a result I made some of the best friends I have and I have the best career anyone could have. All rich gifts.

Last week, I was sitting in front of Deepak Chopra listening to many examples and stories about when we give we are also receiving and when we are receiving we are also giving. Seems so easy and obvious, doesn’t it? Through my injury and pain, my daughter and I both received a great relationship with my father. My father received total love and forgiveness from me. And we had so much fun being together and shared so many laughs along the way.

Becoming aware of gifts or blessings could be noticing a smile from a person or giving or receiving a compliment, or sharing a meal together. Every day now, I acknowledge a blessing or gift for the day.

Deepak says be appreciative of what’s happening in your life right now. This very minute have gratitude for what’s happening in your life and around you. Take time to quiet your mind and body to be open to receive this greatest of gifts. He suggested that any time you come into contact with anybody give them something. It doesn’t have to be material – it can be a flower, a compliment, a smile, or a prayer. The most powerful forms of giving are non-material, of course. The gifts of caring, attention, affection, appreciation, and love are some of the most precious gifts you can give and they don’t cost you anything.

This holiday season, open yourself up to others by giving and receiving.
Best to you all,
Diane

I wanted to share some more ideas to help inspire you to create excellence in your life – your personal and/or professional life.

The following steps to creating excellence are taught by John Overdurf in his basic NLP trainings. His work is so magical, you can’t help but be motivated!

Ready to take care of business to get where you want to be professionally?

1. Know your outcome
People respond best when they know what they want as opposed to what they don’t want. It’s great to know what you don’t want, too. Make lists. Start to envision what your preferred professional life looks like – which conditions make work desirable? which conditions are not negotiable? intolerable? Once you can envision what your best professional scenario looks like, you’ll be able to make good decisions that lead you down the path to that preferred outcome.

2. Be flexible
The person with the most flexibility will be the controlling element in the system. Being flexible and adaptable is truly an asset. It doesn’t mean you’re going to compromise every time there’s conflict, or give up on your dreams – it simply means you’re willing and able to go with the curves life’s road takes sometimes. When you have a focused outcome, you’re also able to see different routes to get where you ultimately want to go. (There’s more than one way, you know!) When you haven’t got the outcome set in your mind, a bumpy ride might throw you off. Remember, you can always change your behavior and your route without altering your preferred outcome.

3. Use your senses with precision
To reach your outcome, you’ve got to know whether you’re getting closer to it or further away. Learn to read feedback. Learn to reassess along the way. Learn to take risks and challenge yourself. And, most importantly, remember that “failure is only feedback.”

4. Take action – now!
This is personal power. Make a decision. Take an action. Do something. You can always change your path if one decision doesn’t get you to where you want to go. Again, when your ultimate goal is solid, you can use your decision-making and coping skills to guide you. Sitting around stewing about decisions may only frustrate you in the long run. Do something! Do it now! It’s all temporary anyway, and you can always change course.

5. Ask HOW, not WHY
When your professional goal is solid and vivid, and you’ve clearly and carefully assessed why you want to get to a certain level of performance that’s rooted in your core values, all you need to ask yourself next is how can you best reach your professional goals with the tools and skills you have within you. Make a plan. Strategize your best routes. And, GO!

Many people feel that they don’t communicate well with others, that it’s a challenge to really get to know someone intimately. When you know yourself, truly, you are more apt to share that true self with others which can be enriching and rewarding, to say the least. But why is this preferred state so difficult to achieve?

Many of us mask our true feelings, desires, life goals behind what we “should” feel, think, or do. Many of us don’t have strong awareness of what we do or why we do it. And, many more of us don’t want to “go there” – to dig deeper into ourselves to understand our motivations because we might see something we don’t wish to. This is a real fear. Some of us feel quite broken. Some not worthy of self love. Others, still, imagine losing control if they stop to actually look at what’s going on inside.

It’s your life, of course, and you make it what you want it to be. But why not do that soul searching, the hard work to see what’s really going on – and figure out how to make strong changes if you don’t like what you see? When you engage in such introspection, you certainly might feel uncomfortable. But when you commit to learning who you really are – becoming aware of your inner being, how you wish to thrive and communicate – you commit to a deeper level of self understanding wich benefits all around you.

This is part of communicating with yourself. It might be something completely new, but when you learn how to communicate deeply and meaningfully with yourself, your communications with others can certainly be more enhanced, too.

Why not get to know who you really are? Why not dive into the hard work? Why not right now?